Twilight’s big thing is actually magic (despite the stars in her cutie mark), so an astrology pony would be pretty different right off the bat! I also think that any species could logically do astronomy. Just keep the color scheme and cutie mark different, and I wouldn’t worry about it. -M
Hey y’all! Two quick reminders.
- Please remember that cutie marks are required for submissions! All recent submissions with no cutie mark included have been discarded.
- Please also note that this blog is not for shaming ‘bad OCs’! This blog is for critique and helpful suggestions to improve your own OCs. Please do not submit other people’s OCs without their permission.
Thanks guys! -M
This is my OC, Choco Cherry Shake, Cherry for short.
I don’t have much of a backstory for her yet, besides she runs a milkshake shop in Manehattan and is friends with Rarity
do you recommend any changes?
- Love the name and the cutie mark! Only thing I’d change about the mark is making the color of the glass a bit lighter- it doesn’t play well with the pink as-is.
- As for the rest of the design, the mane colors and the color of her vest are waaaay to desaturated, I think. They don’t let the cutie mark pop. Try pulling colors straight from the cutie mark to use! You may find that this means the pink coat color doesn’t work so well, but I think having the cutie mark stand out should be your top priority.
- (I also wouldn’t recommend having her be close friends with canon characters, as it comes off as Sue-ish, but that’s up to you.) -M
Name: Astral Blitzen
Occupation: Dog caretaker
Cute Mark: Collar and bone
- The image is certainly very nice, but I don’t think she’s changed at all since the last time I reviewed her? My old commentary still stands, I think… -M
Hello. I’ve got a few ponies that I’ve wanted a second opinion on for a while, and you’ve seen so many designs you probably know by heart by now what makes a good OC. I kind of took advantage of what you said about submitting more than one pony, so I hope you don’t mind the amount of designs I submitted ;o;
With each one I’ll just list a quick few things about them c:
The one above is Star Catcher, a star-gazing bat pony who often stays up late at night/early morning watching the skies. She’s often grumpy in the morning and needs coffee to keep her awake.
- She’s very pretty! I love the cutie mark. I think the accessories are a bit much (just the hairties and the big star clip would be enough for regular wear, I think), but I’d absolutely love love love to see them on her as formalwear.
The unicorn is Frost Bite, who’s a snow-maker in Cloudsdale. She uses a walk-on-clouds spell in order to get to the weather factory. Lines (c) Koda
- I assume using the spell full-time would be tiring, don’t you think? It would also make it hard for her to do her job, probably, if she used magic to do it…
- Either way, the design itself is nice. I think the fading on her legs is overkill, but that’s just me. I like the white makeup, though. I’d also like to see her with light blue hair like her cutie mark, just to see how it looks.
(This is actually a design I’m putting up an auction for, but I’d still love some feedback. The info I put down is just how I envision her, but it may change with her new owner after the auction.) This is Blue Bell, a sheepherder with a corgi as a friend.
- Very cute. I think the scarf and the little braid may be difficult to render in the cartoony MLP style without looks cluttered, though. I’d just go with the bow on her tail.
- I’d also change those bright green eyes to blue, to keep the blue in the design prominently, since her name is Blue Bell after all!
And finally this is Treasure Trove, a kleptomaniac pirate thief.
- This is a pony I’d actually like to see more accessories on, if she’s a pirate!
- The cutie mark is good, but I’d render it bigger so it’s easier to see.
- Her face sort of gets lost in her hair, so I’d like to maybe see her with a blonde-ish gold hair color rather than the brown. And, again, I’d remove the darker ‘tips’ on her nose and hooves, so that her features don’t fade into her outline.
I’m really sorry if there’s too much text for four ponies in all. Thank you so much for taking the time to do this. You’re awesome <3
- Nope, you’re good! Don’t worry about it. I actually prefer more ponies in a submission rather than tons and tons of text.
- Overall, you’ve got great designs going, and wow, you’re good at pony names! I hope those little tiny bites of critique help you out! -M
Resubmitting Violet Rose after a few tweaks - most notably, a cutie mark!
As a reminder, her special talent is mathematics, but now she’s a graduate student studying magi-lectrical engineering in Canterlot. I wanted her to have a mark in graph theory, which is both my area of study and would be suitable for, say, a circuitboard designer, so I picked a common, familiar graph:
According to Wikipedia, it’s sometimes known as a “mystic rose” (HO HO SEE WUT I DID THAR). To be honest, I’ve only ever heard it called K_5, or the complete graph on 6 vertices, but I feel like pony musicians would assign fun nicknames to their graphs.
Personality-wise, she’s quite shy, and normally somewhat quiet - except when talking about her work or favourite novels! She moved from Manehattan to Canterlot to continue her studies, but still exchanges letters with her closest and best friend “back home”. However, she tries to remain friendly and positive around her classmates when she does interact with them, and has a few friends with whom she frequently studies.
- Awesome! I like this cutie mark. You made it play nicely with her color scheme, and it’s always cool to see ponies with more math or science-based cutie marks!
- I don’t think I’d change her, I like her a lot! You made the name work and the cutie mark work and that’s about what she needed! Excellent job. -M
Name: Sage (I am still thinking of a last name for her)
Species: Earth pony
Cute Mark: Mortal and pestle
- Love the cutie mark! Don’t think I’d change her design too much, though I might give her a different eye color that stands out more than the current one- it sort of fades between her mane color and coat color as-is. -M
Here’s Nocturne and Fantasia, twins from Baltimare who are now performing all around Equestria.
Nocturne’s talent is playing music on the piano and Fantasia’s talent is composing original pieces.
So, what do you think?
- I LOVE THEIR DESIGNS. LOOK HOW CUTE AND SWEET AND PRETTY THEY ARE!!
- I think my only critique is that I’d give Fantasia a different eye color than yellow (her palette seems more restricted compared to Nocturne’s as-is). -M
I suppose the first pic I posted is the most accurate image of Cutie Critic thus far, except with fuller hair! -M
Easiest? I don’t think any OC is particularly easy to make (most good OCs emerge from lots of time and care!) but I think, when it comes to pony OCs, the design process is simplest when you come up with the pony’s name first. If you have an awesome pony name, I find that the rest of the design comes easy! -M
Can’t say that I do! Does anyone take browser pony commissions? -M
Their talent can be holiday-specific! They’d just need a regular day job instead of a job tied to their talent. -M